Gulp her mojito

It has been a long wait, but in June, I finally came out to the last person in my inner circle: best friend #1! I finally made a trip to New York City, the city that sparked this amazing and life-changing journey of self-discovery. I could not have had a better time or been more pleased with her response and support.

My initial plan was to tell her over coffee on the afternoon after I arrived in the city. But because of the schedule that followed my arrival, we did not have the chance to sit and speak one-on-one until the evening over dinner and drinks, which turned out to be a great place and time to make my announcement.

I decided to tell the same story I have told others. As I prepared myself and tried to determine the best place in our flowing conversation to bring up the subject, I remember still being anxious and a heightened heartbeat. They say that coming out gets easier over time, and I'd have to agree. But I still get the anxiety and nerves. Though I had come out to many important people in my inner circle, this was by far one of the most long-awaited and poignant.

During a pause in our conversation, I took the opportunity to tell my story. I got through it with a huge smile, but it was not without unexpected and comical interruption. Best friend #1 responded well and in such fashion. Mid-story, she stole my thunder by asking me to pause so that she could gulp her mojito! I believed she was in slight shock and had not expected this at this time and place, especially to have it end with "I am gay" and a big smile on my face.

I just laughed and smiled. The element of surprise added to the moment. As I continued my story, to express my gratitude toward her acceptance and our long friendship, I began to bawl because her essence touched my heart deeply. Best friend #1 got up from her seat, walked across the table, and gave me a big hug. Our friendship is truly one-of-a-kind, and I am unsure whether I can fully document this experience in writing.

Between the laughter and sudden onset of tears, we may have made a slight scene. Imagine: a male patron bawling in the middle of dinner, sitting across from a girl. Girl consoles boy with a hug. The scene yells girl breaks up with boy! Funny, but so false!

Regardless of what conclusions other patrons came to in the boisterous restaurant, it was my coming out experience to best friend #1 and no one was going to interrupt or interfere with it! After the laughter and tears, best friend #1 told me that she did not expect my announcement that night. That's why she had to gulp her mojito and ask me if my coming out to her was really happening - multiple times. I inquired about her thoughts and she simply responded that my sexuality never bothered her or made a difference. She only sees me as myself. The whole package. Not that I'm gay, this, or that. Just myself.

So, of course, we had to celebrate and made a plan to hit up some gay bars in Chelsea that night. We first went to G Lounge, where we mostly sat in a cozy booth and watched the crowd. This place seemed pretty classy, yet casual, and relatively laid back. We finished a round and decided to go to another bar best friend #1 was intrigued with.

At Rawhide, the scene could not be more different. Imagine her surprise. It was a leather bar and relatively empty. We only stayed for a quick drink since we were out of place, but it was interesting observe. We left and walked over a few shops into a sex shop. We perused for a while and on our way out one of the two employees told best friend #1 that I was cute. Unfortunately, it was after the fact when I discovered this, and I did not remember if the employee was attractive. We walked by several other establishments, but don't end up going inside any of them. I had traveled that day, and she was tired, so we called it a night.


During my trip, I walked by Stonewall Inn, where the gay rights movement was born. In past visits to the city, I probably walked right by the historic location without awareness of its significance, but this time I made a point to stop and take it in.




Many people I met in the city recommended The Cuckoo Club at the Hiro Ballroom in Chelsea's The Maritime Hotel. So, on Sunday night, I went to a gay dance club - for the first time - by myself. Let's just say that it was a new experience and I danced with another guy for most of the night. The crowd at this New York City club was really raunchy. I first-hand saw two guys, who were buddies, sandwich a drunk guy, ease his pants down to his thighs, and give him a side of finger-fucking and masturbation in the middle of the dance floor. I guess gays can be quite the casual sexual beings - and in public.

I left New York City feeling bittersweet. Sweet, because I had finally accomplished coming out to my inner circle and had another memorable time with best friend #1. I was on a high. Bitter, because I did not want to leave and had missed New York City Pride. Logistics did not fall into place. It simply was not meant to be. Since this trip, my conversations with best friend #1 have ventured into new territories and taken us into a deeper level of friendship. I am blessed to have such a great inner circle of friends!